


just for tonight

by shininryu



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Age Difference, Angst, Bottom Shin Hoseok | Wonho, First Time, Implied/Referenced Cheating, M/M, WHbingo, shownu is somewhat a sugar daddy but only if you squint, wow this was hella emo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-04
Updated: 2017-05-04
Packaged: 2018-10-27 19:40:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10815420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shininryu/pseuds/shininryu
Summary: Something good tonight will make me forget about you for now





	just for tonight

**Author's Note:**

> this is sad and that wasn't my initial idea *shrugs*
> 
> first time square for WHbingo

****

* * *

Hoseok's head lays in Hyunwoo's lap, Hyunwoo's fingers running through the lavender hair. They lay in silence on the bed in their small room. There was an obvious elephant in the room, and it had been for a few days now; both of them not wanting to address it. Hoseok knew that this entire situation wasn't right, but how could he resist it? How could he resist a man who gave him everything he always wanted and more? He knew he shouldn't be with a man like this, not a married man, with two children and a beautiful wife. They didn't deserve this. They didn't deserve the lying. His wife didn't deserve to have her husband see someone else- to see an 18 year old boy with a broken home and could barely support himself.

And that's how he met Hyunwoo.

Hoseok works as a waiter at some hole in the wall café near his apartment. He couldn't complain though. The job pay for his rent that he shares with a friend he met at the café. The other was in need of a roommate to help split the rent and Hoseok needed a place to stay after running away from home. He agreed to let Hoseok stay because he would feel bad to have Hoseok ending up unsafe. Since then, he's made a best friend out of him- out of Hyungwon. To Hoseok, Hyungwon has it all; attending college full time, handling a part time job, and having a family who loved him.

_"Hoseok, I'm not going to lecture you on what's wrong and what's right, but this... I don't think you should be doing this." Hyungwon said, stuffing his face with noodles. The two had ordered take out as they both had off and Hyungwon had finish schoolwork early. The best thing they do is order food, lounge around, and watch dramas._

_"But, it could help me... us! We can pay for rent better. We could even get a car-"_

_"Hoseok..."_

_"Hyungwon. Listen, there won't be any sex involved, okay? He already told me he wasn't in this for sex, he just wanted someone to be around, you know? We've chatted for about two months now, and we have made it clear already. Just trust me on this."_

_Hyungwon rolled his eyes. "Whatever, dude. But if he hurts you in any way, I will make sure he will never be found again."_

_Hoseok chuckled. "Is that because your father knows people?"_

_"Yes and no." Hyungwon raised an eyebrow and points his fork at Hoseok. "Make sure to give him my hollow threat, just in case."_

Hoseok turns his head to look up at Hyunwoo. Hyunwoo looks down at him and brushes hair from his forehead. "I think it's time for me to tell you everything, Hoseok. You can't keep pushing it away and not wanting to know."

"Okay." Hoseok sighs.

Hyunwoo adjusts himself on Hoseok's bed. He can see the hurt in Hoseok's eyes and he wants to take it away. He knows he's the cause, but he doesn't want to be, not anymore.

"My wife and I," Hoseok tenses already and Hyunwoo feels it. "She knows. She... she knows that I haven't been faithful. She knows I am seeing someone outside of our marriage, but she doesn't know who."

"So, she doesn't know you've been seeing... another guy?" Hyunwoo nods. "So, she doesn't know it's a guy younger than you?"

"She knows. She notices that I'm always on the phone, coming home from work late... she never says anything to the kids, but we are going to get help. We want to go to marriage counseling and figure out what we are missing in our marriage. To get back how we used to be. I've just become so unhappy these days, and I've been wanting to seek some thrill. I get that in you."

_Hoseok was working the register while Hyungwon and a few other co-workers were making orders and brought out fresh pastries from the back. He looked up from rereading the menu at least a five times when someone cleared their throat at him. His eyes met a pair of brown ones that you could easily get lost in._

  _"H-hello. What would you like?" Hoseok could barely get out. He was struck with the case of the stutters from the beautiful man in front of him._

_"A medium black coffee with cream and sugar is good for me." He smiled at Hoseok._

_"Coming up." Hoseok said and yelled to his co-workers for the order. "That will be $2.67."_

_Hyunwoo gave Hoseok a 5 and their hands touched ever so slightly, and Hoseok jolted. Hyunwoo's eyes creased as bright as his smile at Hoseok's nervousness._

_A co-workered handed Hyunwoo his drink and he motions for Hoseok to keep the change._

_Ever since then, Hyunwoo came nearly every morning, seeing Hoseok sometimes when he worked mornings. Sooner than later, Hyunwoo asked Hoseok for his number. Hoseok didn't think much of it, until it became more than just friendly conversations. Hyunwoo promised to give Hoseok anything he wanted and he shouldn't hesitate to ask him. Hoseok didn't think it was such a bad idea... until he found out about Hyunwoo's wife and children. He felt guilt, a tremendous amount because he would never want to ruin anyone's family._

_But Hoseok couldn't get enough of Hyunwoo. They never did anything more than make out or give each other head from time to time, but Hoseok wouldn't let it go further than that. If he had a guilty conscious, he could have just a small piece left to hold on to._

Hoseok sniffles, using his sleeve to wipe under his nose. He can't look up at Hyunwoo. He can't let him see him cry.

"I didn't expect our final time meeting up to be like this, Hoseok. Honestly." Hyunwoo turns Hoseok's head and he sees the younger's eye brim with tears and turn red. "Please don't cry."

Hoseok didn't want to cry, but he couldn't help it. He found love in Hyunwoo. He's never really had a father figure, and surely not a loving family. Hyunwoo gave him just that. He listened to him when he was frustrated, gave him love and attention when he needed it the most, and lastly, actually made him feel like he had a home- a home in Hyunwoo.

"I'm so stupid." Hoseok palms his forehead. "Why did I think it was okay for this to happen? A married man? Fucking hell!"

Hyunwoo hates when the younger is so hard on himself. He grips Hoseok's hand before he starts to hit his head again. "Stop." Hyunwoo croaks. "Hoseok, you know I care about you more than anything, but this is my fault. Please don't blame yourself. I'm the one who came to you. I asked you for your number."

"But i agreed!"

Hoseok sits up on his bed leaving space between himself and Hyunwoo. Hyunwoo reaches out for Hoseok's hand, firmly gripping it. Hoseok rests his head on Hyunwoo's broad shoulder, letting the tears flow from him. Hyunwoo tries his hardest to keep himself composed, but it hurts him the most to know that Hoseok is hurting because of him. He promised Hoseok he would never want to hurt him because he knew how much he had suffered and he didn't want to be another tally to add to it. (Also after hearing Hyungwon's threat, he didn't want to end up missing).

Hoseok cries for a few minutes, nothing too dramatic. Hyunwoo kisses Hoseok's hair, rubbing his thumb over Hoseok's hand. Hoseok looks up at Hyunwoo with pleading eyes, giving Hyunwoo a loving kiss. His hand grips for Hyunwoo's hair, lightly pulling. Hyunwoo groans, deepening the kiss. Hoseok throws his legs over Hyunwoo's lap, straddling him. Hoseok grinds himself against Hyunwoo. He moans into Hyunwoo's mouth and reaches lower for elder's belt, but he stops him.

"Hoseok, wait."

Hoseok doesn't stop as he's kissing Hyunwoo harder. His fingers tremble as he tries to loosen Hyunwoo's belt.

"I don't want you to do this."

Hoseok stops, resting his forehead on Hyunwoo's. "Why? Don't you love me?"

"You know I do, but I don't want your first time to be in this type of situation-"

Hoseok cups Hyunwoo's face. "It's okay. I want this. I want you."

_"You know what's interesting? The whole concept of just sex. Literally, today at work, all the guys talked about who they slept with and their first time, and I couldn't say anything. Even Hyungwon joined in! It just feels like high school all over again." Hoseok groaned._

_"Don't worry about it babe. There's going to be a time when it's right for you. Don't rush it."_

_"How was it like for you? Your first time?"_

_Hyunwoo cleared his throat. "It was nice. He was really romantic. Kind of cliché, but it was really nice. He had the room lit up, roses on the bed- it was truly magical."_

_"He?"_

_Hyunwoo noded. "Yeah! My first time was with a guy at college. He was my boyfriend for a while. Our break up was awful though. It ended horribly and it actually just ruined me for a while. I was afraid to trust, afraid to love- but I met my wife, and she just made that better."_

_"Until now, huh?" Hoseok stated._

_"I guess so."_

_Hoseok snuggled closer Hyunwoo and kissed his cheek. "I hope my first time could be just as magical."_

Hoseok lays on the bed, taking Hyunwoo along with him. Hyunwoo's larger body shields Hoseok's, planting his hands on either side of Hoseok's head. "I trust you, Hyunwoo. I-I love you."

"I love you too."

Hoseok knows Hyunwoo loves him, but not the same like he did before this- before his wife found out and this all became terribly wrong. He wants to cry, to scream, the punch the wall into his knuckles are bruised because his love is lost. Hyunwoo can say he loves him, but he knows it's not true. Not anymore.

Hoseok feels completely in bliss when he and Hyunwoo are together, naked in his bed. Hyunwoo knows what he's doing, which makes Hoseok's slight pain turn to pleasure faster than anything. The feeling of Hyunwoo in him, the feeling of them being one, is better than Hoseok could ever explain. Hoseok's moans fill the air in the room as Hyunwoo pleasures him. Hyunwoo kisses Hoseok's cheek and takes his hand in his, intertwining their fingers together. Hoseok feels truly happy for once- truly in bliss, even if it's just temporary.

~

Hoseok wakes up the next morning with soreness at his backside and an empty bed. He begins to cry- sobbing. He's sobbing so loud that it echoes through the house.

"Fuck!" He screams loudly enough that he knows the neighbors have to hear. Hyungwon panics and runs into his room. He sees Hoseok curled in a ball in his bed and rushes to his side. He gets into bed with him and holds him. He pets his hair and hugs him tightly to his chest. Hyungwon's there to pick up the pieces when Hoseok's world begins to fall apart. He's always there.

"Hyungwon." Hoseok cries. "I...I..."

"I know, Hoseok. I know." Hyungwon sighs and plants a kiss in his best friend's hair. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> i am a big ball of emoness. poor hoseok ):


End file.
